if you weren't paying attention last night, Maine voters denied same sex couples the right to marry. my views on gay marriage aren't a big secret, i am for it. after all, if a homosexual man or woman wants to be in a miserable, loveless marriage, they should be allowed to do it.
however, this may be the key to the voting. the straight people aren't homophobic. they are saving same sex couples from the misery of marriage and divorce. as it stands now, same sex couples don't have the legal issues when the relationship is over. they don't have to hire a lawyer or sit across the table from their former lover while they fight over stupid shit. who really cares about the gravy boat that aunt sally gave you as a present? they can leave with the stuff they brought into the relationship.
the reader shouldn't mistake my satire for a serious commentary. it is a sad state of affairs when people are misled by fear or hate to forsake the basic human right to find love with another person and announce that love by having a wedding. i am not surprised. the whole of human existence is filled with actions taken out of fear or hate. it is my hope that this non-issue manages to work itself out sometime soon.
this brings up a good question. does marriage ruin perfectly good relationships or do the wrong people get married? or is it both?
- miss wolfe
3 comments:
I think a lot of people have unspoken expectations of marriage, which is why, surprisingly, people who live together first have a higher divorce rate than those who don't. It's like "when we're married he/she'll change". People don't talk about money, aren't honest about whether they want kids and so on.
My first marriage was to a woman who years later realized she was a Lesbian and we parted very amicably. She now lives in a town in Maine that voted against her right to marry her partner of 14 years. It's sad.
And it won't stop them from being homosexuals! THEY'RE STILL HERE, AND THEY'RE STILL QUEER!
You're right, the institution of marriage is in trouble. You'd think marriage advocates would welcome people who are *desperate* to be married. There are only two reasons to oppose this:
1/irrational fear/hate of homosexuals
2/belief in certain interpretations of certain passages in the Bible
And in Maine, the Catholic church harnessed both of those to win, just as the Mormons did in California recently.
I was not a proud Mainer today. It was a sad turning of events but as Al said, the issue isn't going to go away, we just have keep fighting the good fight.
It's not the wrong people getting married so much couples that are unwilling to make the compromises necessary for a long lasting relationship. People learn, unfortunately, for many, it takes a failed relationship or two.
I know a guy who got divorced in a large part because his belief that women shouldn't have responsibilities outside of the home and his first wife wanted to go back to college and maybe get a part-time job once their kids were in school and she had some free time during the day. She still would have been home to meet the kids at the bus in the afternoon; but in his worlds "your only job is to be a mom". They kids wouldn't have even noticed.
She ended up being the custodial parent, and having to get a full-time job which they did notice. His second wife was a career woman who away from home much more than his first wife would have been; but by then he had learned it wasn't his place to run his wife's life.
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