A Serious Question

i was talking to my mom this weekend. she tells me that they are going to host a family reunion at the house. it will be a big group of family, most of which i haven't seen in years, walking around my house. i will be in hell. however, there is a point to this post. there is a member of my family that adopted kids instead of the old fashion way. we were never close to this member of the family. the last time we saw them would be like 6 years ago. the one son they adopted was hot back then and will probably be hot now. is it wrong if i flirt with him or want to do things with him?

- miss wolfe

Five Fact Friday

fact #1 i had mcdonald's for the first time in a year and a half today. i felt nauseous within five minutes. i am waiting a couple more years before i give it another chance.
fact #2 i got a good laugh out of a viral video this week. it reminded me of a post i did back in april.
fact #3 i am beginning to like my current location in the midwest. i do miss the ocean and beach. however, the used book stores, great food, hot guys do make up for it.
fact #4 i have been spending a lot of time with the frat guys and athletes here. nothing too wild has happened yet.
fact #5 i almost had a George Carlin moment today. my boss comes into the lab today and says, "i have looked everywhere for my keys and can't find them." his grad student says, "they are always the last place you look for them." the grad student said this seriously. i wanted to tell them how stupid their statements were but i held it inside. i ended up giggling which they didn't understand.

-miss wolfe

E-mail

i am answering an e-mail for today's post.

I'd like to get your opinion on a scenario. You're bisexual and female, so I think you have a pretty unique perspective. Hope it isn't too boring for ya.

1. Imagine that you are a guy.
2. You are at a bar/club.
3. You want to have sex with a female patron.

How would you go about doing that? What mistakes do you see guys making? Any advice about creating sexual energy?

i don't see why you would say i have a unique perspective as a bisexual woman then ask me to pretend to be a man. you also ask what mistakes i see guys making. why would a guy pay attention to what the other guy does?

i am going to answer the last question first because it is easiest. it is my belief that people can't create sexual energy with another person. the energy is there or it isn't. there are situations that will accentuate existing sexual energy between people that already have it. however, a person can't create it without some sort of illegal drug dropped in a drink.

the other questions, i don't go into a club, bar, or whatever looking to hook up. in the past, i had this sort of mentality and i found that i came off as too eager. the eagerness wasn't something that men found attractive. they are more anxious for that subtle girl that will turn out to be the wildcat in bed. any guy can get the slut, fuck her and forget her. it was the same approach with men and myself. i didn't want the guy that was putting out the signal to every woman that walked by him. this is the mistake that most men that go to a club looking to get fucked make. the chances are he will fuck anything so when it comes to the end of the night he will take any woman that is left behind or who is super drunk just to get his nut. i looked for the guy that was relaxed, had a i don't care attitude and had some confidence. these guys don't reek of desperation. desperation is the biggest turn off ever, even more than lack of confidence.

my tips are go into the place relaxed, be confident when you approach a woman (note not dickish, i said confident), let things happen naturally (don't force an issue). Otherwise, you will be getting someone that was left behind in the pack.

- miss wolfe

Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker, Tits

There’s an idea that the human body is somehow evil and bad and there are parts of it that are especially evil and bad, and we should be ashamed. Fear, guilt and shame are built into the attitude toward sex and the body. ... It’s reflected in these prohibitions and these taboos that we have.

those words were spoken by a true genius and satirist of American culture. he was George Carlin and he has passed away. i mention a lot of celebrities from time to time. these people are crushes and have no real bearing on my life. however, George Carlin is different. he challenged and changed society through words and laughter. no topic was taboo for him. he satired religion, obscenity, death, sex, ... . he was not all about obscenity, my post title may disagree. he showed us how ridiculous we could be. he had the perfect understanding of human nature. out of all the jokes he said, one in particular stands out in my mind. it is not something insightful or dirty. it is silly. its about him feeding his dog rubber bands so it is easier to pick up the dog shit. i don't know why it stands out, but it does. godspeed George.

-miss wolfe

Five Fact Friday

fact #1 i am in love with Jordana Spiro. she isn't particularly hot but extremely cute.
fact #2 this is sort of related to number 1. Jim Gaffigan is one of the comedians i would pay to go see. he has a very odd sense of humor but it makes me laugh hard. *hot pocket*
fact #3 i am probably one of the few older people excited to go see Wall-E on friday. i love pixar movies and this movie looks great.
fact #4 on wednesday, i was brushing my teeth when i had to sneeze suddenly. i was forced into the choice of making sure my mouth didn't open because of the toothpaste. i didn't want to get it on my clothes. i sneeze and the toothpaste came out my nose a little. i don't recommend this.
fact #5 i have recently become addicted to sudoku. damn you japanese number games!

- miss wolfe

Where's that remote?

this first thing is kind of old news but i was watching Craig Ferguson and he mentioned it. it is an technological advancement in vasectomies. apparently, men can have some device put in their testicles to either allow or block the flow of sperm in their ejaculation with a remote control. i've thought about this over the last couple days. it occurs to me that the only guys that would have use of this particular device is unfaithful men. they would be the people to benefit from it the most. they certainly don't want to knock up their mistresses because it complicates their life. however, if i was a man, i don't think i would want some electronic device installed in my balls. the first thought that comes to mind is what if it short circuits.

the next story doesn't really surprise me but it is still weird. a reader forwarded a story from a UK paper to me today about the g-shot. according to the article, this g-shot makes women multi-orgasmic on a regular basis. i admit i am good at getting myself off with some g-spot stimulation but men usually have no clue. i don't know why men don't go looking for it because when they found it, their woman would probably do anything for them out of gratitude. i don't know about injecting collagen into my body period, much less my g-spot. i am a bit curious to the results. part of me wants to try it once to see if the results are true.

this is really the duh news article. the NY Times recently wrote about women finding the naked female form more attractive than the naked male form. i am not shocked by this at all. i always found a naked woman much more of a turn on than a naked man. women have soft skin, curves, smell better, etc... . men are attractive to me too but there is a difference. there is nothing that can replace a sexy, in shape guy working with his shirt off. the sweat glistening on him and watching him move. however, guys naked just aren't the same. i would take brad pitt naked in front of me and it would get me excited. however, his wife in front of me in the same state of undress would excite me more. on a side note, if i were lindsay lohan, why the hell would i go to that unattractive looking "woman" to express my bisexual urges.

- miss wolfe

Candy Wrapper = Bad Influence?

a person at work brought in some of those dove chocolate squares. she offered me some so i took two pieces. i unwrap one of the pieces and notice a "fortune" on the inside of the wrapper. it reads, "Be mischievous. It feels good." i chuckle and continue doing work. after lunch, i go back to the lab and have the other piece of chocolate. i look at the message inside the wrapper with some amazement. it reads, "Hey, why not?" what is my candy trying to tell me? i think God is trying to send me a message.

- miss wolfe

Five Fact Friday

i finally got my computer onto the wifi network here at my summer job. you would think i was some sort of malcontent with the hoops i had to jump through.

fact #1 the last week and a half i felt like the characters in the south park episode without internet. i felt lost without my e-mail and such. it wasn't that i didn't have a way to connect, but i wasn't really going to blog and respond to e-mails at the lab i am working. it isn't the best thing to work on a sex blog at work in my opinion.
fact #2 i had such a wonderful welcome to the midwest. i got here to foul weather and tornado warnings. it could only get better from there.
fact #3 i sit here watching Indiana Jones until i go out. i never really noticed how extremely similar the music is between Indiana Jones and Star Wars. it is like john williams didn't even try to do something different.
fact #4 in my first week of work, i found lots of possible fun. i am going out to a party with one tonight. it is the best part of big college towns.
fact #5 i've decided that i am tired of moving clothes every three months. next year, i am staying in one freaking place so i better find a resume building job really close to where i am.

-miss wolfe