Why I Will Never Get a Job Teaching Sex Education in High School?

from the website The Oatmeal:

- miss wolfe

Good News If You Live in New Mexico

apparently, it is not a crime to have sex in public in New Mexico.

SANTA FE, N.M. (AP) -- He's in uniform and apparently on duty. But New Mexico State Police said the officer caught on camera having sex with a woman on the hood of a car did not commit a crime.

i will have to look for a place to live in New Mexico after I leave Spain. i will have to carry a copy of the article to show the arresting officers. they will have to change their state motto, the land of enchantment, to something much more appropriate.

New Mexico, the Land of Anywhere, Anytime.

- miss wolfe

Feeling Musical

"We'll take the whole shebang
All or nothing, anything
Ecstasy's the birthright of our gang
We'll take the whole shebang
Free your heart of guilt and shame
Come and claim what's yours
The whole shebang"

from the song The Whole Shebang by Grant-Lee Buffalo

- miss wolfe

Comparisons

i was in the US for a month and a half recently to visit family and enjoy being home. it isn't quite home, Boston is more home, then Spain, and finally where my parents now live. i could put D.C. in the list; the location ranks a smidgen lower than Spain. i am digressing. people, men and women, ask me about the men in Spain when in the US, and the men in the United States when in Spain.

there is little difference between men. granted there are some inconsequential differences but men tend to act the same no matter where you are located. they are not all smoother or more attractive because you cross a border or ocean. they still want pussy and have difficulty convincing women to let them have it. this is the average man, we aren't talking some sexual superman because they exist in all countries.

a difference, which can be minor or major, is language, especially during excited utterances. at some point over the previous year in Spain, my dirty talk went into spanish. i don't mean just saying "aye papi". it caught some spanish men off guard me spouting off english while getting fucked good. there was a mildly entertaining incident this summer while i was back in the US.

this may be difficult to imagine but i was riding this guy. (i know a shock) it had been about a week since my last really good, non-mastubatory orgasm. my legs on either side of the guy, still wearing my heels, and my hips circling on his cock while i leaned back. i wasn't saying much because of the goodness building in all the wonderful spots. my guy leaned forward and he is going a little deeper inside me. the head of his cock starts to rub against the right place. my pussy instantly clenches and the most amazing orgasm engulfs my body. when i can speak again, it was nothing but spanish coming out of my mouth. the guy looked at me like was speaking an alien language.

- miss wolfe

Antropologists are Wrong!

it is common among anthropologists that men were the hunters and provided food in prehistoric hunter-gathering tribes. the big, strong man went out to provide for his brood while the woman fashioned bikinis out of the hides of the animals, much like Raquel Welch in One Million Years B.C.

i can disprove this theory with one example. i had the displeasure of using a male restroom the other day when the women's room was not in working order. upon entering the men's room, i notice the urinal area. words cannot justify the scene before my eyes. it looked like someone took a squirt bottle of urine and sprayed it on the urinal, wall and floor. i waited a couple days because it could have been a fluke. the janitors did go through the floor and clean. there was a similar situation. how can men miss something that they stand a couple issues from and piss?

it convinces me that there is no way that prehistoric males went hunting for the family. they can't hit a big porcelain container right in front of them; how the hell are they going to hit an animal with a spear feet away? the family would starve!

seriously men, how can you miss something right in front of you with a hose like appendage?

- miss wolfe