Is It Truly Unjust?

if you weren't paying attention last night, Maine voters denied same sex couples the right to marry. my views on gay marriage aren't a big secret, i am for it. after all, if a homosexual man or woman wants to be in a miserable, loveless marriage, they should be allowed to do it.

however, this may be the key to the voting. the straight people aren't homophobic. they are saving same sex couples from the misery of marriage and divorce. as it stands now, same sex couples don't have the legal issues when the relationship is over. they don't have to hire a lawyer or sit across the table from their former lover while they fight over stupid shit. who really cares about the gravy boat that aunt sally gave you as a present? they can leave with the stuff they brought into the relationship.

the reader shouldn't mistake my satire for a serious commentary. it is a sad state of affairs when people are misled by fear or hate to forsake the basic human right to find love with another person and announce that love by having a wedding. i am not surprised. the whole of human existence is filled with actions taken out of fear or hate. it is my hope that this non-issue manages to work itself out sometime soon.

this brings up a good question. does marriage ruin perfectly good relationships or do the wrong people get married? or is it both?

- miss wolfe

People Bug Me Sometimes

a friend forwarded me an article from a Boston free magazine this week. she sent me this because it would get under my skin and i would send some email in reply. she knows her audience well. after writing and rereading my email, i thought that you might enjoy it.

****
This is in response to your One Man's List article. After taking five minutes to read the utter trash, it is my opinion that the writer was confused for a baby seal and beat across the head until he was severely retarded. The writer states, "...I'll also try to make this a little more informative than the typical 'uhhuhuhhuhhuh, guys like sex and sports and beer' column that every collegiate sex columnist...". It is safe to say he utterly failed at this goal. I can sum up his list of 17 items into three things: 1. I like sports 2. I am a self-centered ass who demands all the attention and 3. I like sex. In his defense, he did forget the beer part.

The most disturbing part of the article is point number three. I puked a little in my mouth when he writes about liking Kim Cattrall's tits. I am dumbfounded how someone can find an ancient, leather skinned woman like Kim Cattrall that attractive. If you want an attractive version of Kim Cattrall, he would have to watch Porkie's, Police Academy or Mannequin. Clearly, Kristin Davis had the best body on that show, if you didn't cover Sarah Jessica Parker's head with a bag.

To points eight and seventeen, the writer clearly doesn't understand the irony, not the Alanis Morissette kind, of these two items. He asks women to humor men when they have an unrealistic sports fantasy. However, he is not able to humor us when we feel not so attractive and in need of a compliment to feel better about ourselves.

He continues with the contradictions in points nine and sixteen. Although, it may not be a contradiction as much as not knowing what communication means. Communication is the exchange of ideas, not listening for keywords. The vast majority of men communicate verbally about as well as a three year old hopped up on sugar and Coke. Most men who do communicate verbally are gay or so metro sexual that we are convinced they are gay. As for the problem solving, there are times in both sexes lives when a person wants to vent. The only solution to the problem is to let us talk.

I won't comment on every point to make this shorter. Nevertheless, I have some points to make. Yes, women take too long to get ready sometimes. We like to look good for you, or don't you want the guys in the room to be jealous of you because the hottie is on your arm and not theirs. For an article that isn't supposed to be about guys liking sex, you mention sex in six of the seventeen points. Women and men both hate clingy people. I am reminded of the scene in Swingers where Jon Favreau calls Heather Graham. If we like you, we don't want to seem clingy and scare you off. If you want us to know something about sports, you must know something about an interest of ours. You cannot complain when we want to do a girlie thing when we watch sports with you.

Relationships, which I assume the writer wants, are about give and take. They are about understanding. It is clear he has little of both. It is no wonder he is left to write a misguided approach to "help" women understand men. If he has trouble understanding this email, maybe he should grab one of those bags and use it.

- miss wolfe

Overexposed?

i have a serious question which i should probably know the answer. to all the men reading this, try not laughing at me too hard. is there such a thing as too many pictures of pussy?

now that all the men are done laughing at me, there is a serious aspect to this question. with the popularity of porn, free porn, up-skirt photos, and accidental celebrity no panties pictures; it seems to me that there could be too much exposure to it. the "too much of a good thing" syndrome could apply to this. for example, i LOVE peanut butter but after about the 200th spoonful each day, i can't eat anymore. this also applies to porn. there exists men and women who are over saturated with porn that they need to go to more and more hardcore porn to get off. i couldn't tell you what the more hardcore option is for pussy, so it leads me to believe that men could get bored with it.

again, stop laughing at me. its obvious to any woman that men don't get tired of looking at tits. any person walking down a public street would notice this obsession. i am reminded of a Married with Children episode where kelly and bud distract al and the NO MAAM'ers with a playboy centerfold in order to get to the hidden refrigerator. i suppose this really answers my question. however, i don't own a dick and a male mind so i ask the question.

seriously, stop laughing.

- miss wolfe

Some People are Special

Warning: This post is not a happy go lucky post. It is a pissed off rant.

if you aren't aware, roman polanski, famous director of Rosemary's Baby, drugged, took nude pictures and raped a 13 year old girl (he was 45 at the time) in 1978. after pleading guilty and then finding out he would spend actual time in jail instead of probation, he fled the country to avoid his sentence. if you are counting, he is now guilty of rape, child pornography, corruption of a minor, and failure to appear.

in my opinion, the authorities having this man arrested is a good thing. however, the hollywood types disagree with this. the stupidest of the hollywood types is whoopi goldberg. according to whoopi, polanski didn't commit "rape-rape". WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?!?!?!? the man is scum. he gave a little girl drugs and alcohol then preceded to have sex with her while she told him to stop. if this isn't rape, i have not idea what is rape. this would be considered rape even if it happened while she was the age of legal consent.

let's explore this whole whoopi thing a little more. whoopi goldberg is a feminist. feminists are the people that support women's rights? she is defending one of the hollywood types and throwing women under the bus. i mean it wasn't real rape or as she likes to say "rape-rape". obviously the 13 year old girl was asking for it. did she only say no once? after all, a woman can't mean no if she only says it once. was the girl dressed sexy? we all know that a girl that dresses sexy is obviously asking for it. i ask again, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?

let's suppose roman polanski was a member of NAMBLA, a regular joe and it was a 13 year old boy. there is no way in hell he would get the outpouring of support from these people. everyone would be calling for him to be on the sexual predator list and he would be in jail for at least a decade. let's suppose roman polanski was a teacher at a middle school and he had sex with a student. he would lose his career, be put in jail for a long time, and be put on the sexual predator list. let's imagine roman polanski is a conservative republican. i could go on but won't bore you with anymore details.

whoopi goldberg is a disgrace. she should never represent the views of feminism. she should be removed from her role on the view. every women should boycott any product she or the view advertises until she is fired. this is not an acceptable stance on "rape-rape".

- miss wolfe

Men and Clothes

after going out last night with friends, i am convinced that men need garanimals just as badly as little boys. i would love to know how the straight male mind works when it comes to getting dressed. let me rephrase the previous sentence, does the straight male mind work when it comes to dressing oneself. men, you don't have to look like you came out of a fashion magazine but look like you put some effort into your clothes. you can pick out clothes which aren't wrinkled to begin.

needless to say, there was no action last night for me. my roommate did get some action last night. i was a bit jealous of her. it isn't a big deal though because i got my fair share of action this week. my hormones were in overdrive this week. i would almost feel sorry for the booty calls guys this week but they went to bed smiling. it isn't my fault it was 11 at night and i was horny.

- miss wolfe